Posted on July 16, 2013 in Child Custody and Support

Thousands of kids will experience the stress of finding out that their parents are divorcing. The age of the child is just one of the factors that will dictate how they will process the news and how they will react. They will also be seriously affected by the circumstances of the divorce. Your children are going to need your guidance while coping with this. In addition to hiring a competent Illinois divorce lawyer, here are a few things that you can help them cope.

Be a Good Example

A part of helping your child cope is displaying healthy coping skills. Do not engage in arguments with your spouse while the children are around. There will be plenty to discuss however, you have to be careful of how you do it. Do not talk about the legal issues such as why you are getting the divorce, financial matters, or custody while in the presence of the child. Your child may hear just part of the conversation and they will feel even worse if it sounds like you are fighting over the child.

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 Posted on July 12, 2013 in Divorce

Many recent divorcees, both men and women, report that they feel alone when they get a divorce. Of course, now that the spouse is gone, there is a lack of companionship. There is also another part of the isolation. Many divorced people report that they lose approximately 40 percent of their friends. What causes this phenomenon when it would be apparent that this is the time that you would need your friends the most?

The Stigma

A survey that was conducted showed that there is a stigma among young adults when it comes to divorce. This study showed that women who were divorced multiple times were thought to be immoral and even deviant. Studies show that this stigma does not really affect men. It seems that male divorcees are much more accepted.

The Chosen One

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 Posted on July 08, 2013 in Child Custody and Support

The process of going through a divorce is emotionally and financially stressful. Divorce can become even more stressful when children are involved. Children need to feel loved and secure, and the best way to ensure that children's needs are met is to learn how to co-parent efficiently.

The easiest way to begin making decisions with your ex that will benefit your children is to look at your relationship as a completely new one. This new relationship is not about the two of you, but rather it is about your children. In order to be a successful co-parent, you must always put your children ahead of yourself. You may no longer be a husband or a wife, but you are still a father or a mother.

In order to focus solely on your children, you must put all of your own emotions aside, which can be very difficult. This is both the most important and the most difficult part of working together with your ex. Your child’s happiness, stability, and future well-being are all more important than your current anger or hurt.

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 Posted on July 04, 2013 in Divorce

The Huffington Post has recently reported that a Norwegian study has found that there is a relationship between sharing household duties with your spouse and divorce. According to the study, the divorce rate amongst couples who do housework together was approximately 50 percent higher than those in which the wife is solely in charge of household chores.

However, this finding doesn’t mean that the husband should not be responsible for anything when it comes to housework. The increased rate is presumably related more to “modern” values and attitudes and less to a cause-and-effect relationship. In this modern view, marriage is seen as less sacred than it was in the past.

According to Thomas Hansen, co-author of the study “Equality in the Home,” when couples share household chores “women also have a higher level of education and a well-paid job, which makes them less dependent on their spouse financially. They can manage easier if they divorce.

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 Posted on June 30, 2013 in Child Custody and Support

Adoption is a wonderful thing that brings people together as a family. From infant to teenager, families increase in love and support through adoption. Some children, however, have special needs and/or circumstances that make the adoption more difficult. There are children who are legally under the protection of a part of the government (DCFS), known as wards, and some that are not. Ward children may get some sort of subsidy because of their needs.

There are five ways a child can qualify for an adoption subsidy if they are not under the control of DCFS.

1. A child may qualify if they were determined to be qualified for Social Security Supplemental Security Income (SSI) prior to their adoption. These children do not need to be adopted through a non-profit adoption agency.
2. Children whose adoptive parents receive subsidies remain eligible even if they are adopted again, if, for example, the adoptive parents pass away and another family member adopts the child.

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 Posted on June 25, 2013 in Property Division

When a couple goes through a divorce, it is not usually a happy time. Instead, emotions are high and feelings of retribution may be strong. Deciding who gets what could be challenging. What you assume is yours perhaps now becomes part of the marital assets. In addition, assets may not be divided based on their dollar value, according to the Huffington Post. Your Illinois family law attorney can help you determine how property division might work in your situation.

Understanding how property division works can be complicated especially if there are significant assets involved. In Illinois, the division of property is not as easy as 50/50. That is why knowing what to expect is important to protect what you may feel that you are entitled to.

It is important to understand the differences between 'separate' and 'marital' property. Separate property includes those assets that you came into the marriage with. These assets may also include inheritance and gifts before or during the marriage. You may feel that these assets are rightfully yours, but things may get hairy, if, during the marriage, these assets were combined. For instance, if you received an inheritance from a deceased aunt and you deposit that money into a joint account with your spouse, he or she may now be entitled to it. Likewise, if your spouse added your name to property that he or she owns, it becomes marital property, and is divided during a divorce.

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 Posted on June 16, 2013 in Child Custody and Support

Child custody in divorces is decided individually by state courts, but all states do put the best interests of the child first. Often times, however, parents are concerned about what will happen to their children and have many questions about the process and how the courts will treat each case in Illinois. Your Geneva family law attorney can help you understand the process of determining child custody, and help you to find the best situation for your family.

One question that may come up is whether or not a parent’s psychological problems will have an effect on the custody of the child and if so, what the impact will be. Just because a parent may have a psychological problem, suffer from substance abuse or suffer from mental illness, the courts do not automatically take away the parent's custody rights.

These factors are considered though, such as if the parent’s mental state has a history of causing severe behavior that may harm the child. The court also considers the fact that each parent may be not in a normal mental state during the custody case due to the trauma of the divorce and lifestyle change that comes along with it as well.

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 Posted on June 12, 2013 in Child Custody and Support

A woman faces two counts of class D felony charges of child neglect. She reportedly went to meet a man that she met on the internet but he never showed. While she waited, her 3-year-old daughter was found crossing a busy road alone. It was later discovered that her 1-year-old son was left unattended in the car secured in his car seat with the windows closed and car door unlocked.

A witness driving by spotted the little girl in the road, and pulled over. He took the little girl to a nearby convenience store. A little while later, it was reported that the mother came out of the restaurant, where the meeting was to take place, looking for her daughter. The witness walked the little girl across the busy road again to return the little girl to her mother.

There were several 911 calls about the incident. In an attempt to prevent the woman from leaving the scene, one caller went to her car and there he noticed the 1-year-old son in the car with the windows closed. When he pulled the child from the car he was confronted by the mother, whom witnesses say attacked the man.

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 Posted on June 08, 2013 in Adoption

We have written with some frequency about adoption, both about the process and its benefits. This post deals with related child adoption, where the adopting parent is someone who is already related to the child, e.g. parent, grandparent, brother, sister, stepparent … etc. See 750 ILCS 50/1. This type of adoption normally arises in the context of a stepparent adopting their spouse’s child. A knowledgeable Kane County adoption attorney can help your family withe the process.

Related child adoption gives the stepparent the same legal rights as the child’s natural parents. In other words, the stepparent steps in the same shoes as the birth parent. After the related child adoption process is complete, the stepparent may make important legal decisions on behalf of the child. Related child adoption also imposes certain legal obligations on the stepparent, similar to those of a natural parent. For example, in case of a divorce, the stepparent would have the same rights and support obligations as a birth parent.

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 Posted on June 03, 2013 in Child Custody and Support

In a recent study, it was found that parents who are going through a divorce who focus more on their children rather than their relationship problems are being better parents than those who are not. Conflicts within a marriage and even after a divorce have the most affect on children, according to Dr. Marilyn Coleman. She also says that it can do damage to a child’s development. This is because kids who go through divorce have lost access to both of their parents and if the fighting continues even after the divorce then the children have not only lost access but also are still involved in the constant conflict. It exposes the children to the ugliness of the conflict, which can be very harmful to a child.

Some relationships between divorced couples have improved once they began focusing more on their children. They communicate freely between each other via text, email, or phone. Once these parents became cordial with each other, they could begin communicating about issues that come up in their children’s lives.

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